2nd grader discussion on "being gay"

I just had to share this story today. I teach three 2nd grade girls in an after-school guitar program. Today, one of them asked me if I was married. "Well, actually, no" I said, and left it at that. Then she turns around and goes up to her friend who is at the chalkboard, and says, "Do you know what the word "gay" means? Her friend doesn't say anything..she's too engrossed in drawing on the chalkboard, but she continues on..."well, gay is like on Hannah Montana when Mylie Cyrus has a roommate....that's being gay. And sometimes boys just wanna have a roommate too and don't have to get married, and that's okay. It's okay to be gay."

I couldn't help but smile. These life discussions between kids comes up on occasion when I'm teaching, and I love to just listen to what's inside a child's mind.

Nice to meet you

Let's talk about handshakes. I attended a music conference in NY a few months ago, meeting lots of people, shaking lots of hands. Not unique to this conference, but universally I am floored by how many people have a weak handshake. Sometimes I'm shaking the hand of a director of blah blah blah, or a president of whatitsface, or some other really smart important person, and I am so taken back when they can't even shake my hand. Do I have cooties?? Shake my damn hand! And it's not even a female thing...I've received the most dainty handshake from grown men. I don't know where I learned to shake hands well...from my parents, maybe it's in my genes...who knows, but if you meet me you will get an assertive, but friendly shake, not too strong, not too long, but just right.

I came up with a list of the many different kinds of handshakes you might receive:

The Limp Fish - weak, disappointing, not confident, they didn't really wanna touch you in the first place

The Limp Wet Fish - sweaty hands....you are actually sorry you shook their hand. Possibly sweaty from nerves?

The Schwarzenegger (aka the Bone Crusher) - they shake your hand so hard, squeezing your joints, thinking they are perceived as extra confident, but it just leaves you dumbfounded and in pain


The Oprah - the two-handed hand-clasp that she often does when she gets excited, and with guest she loves: John Travolta, Tom Cruise, Maria Shriver, Jamie Foxx...oh yeah, Jamie Foxx, oh and her best friend Gayle

The Bill Clinton - the two-handed shake which makes him so...mesmerizing. 

                                     

The Hug Shake Shimmy - You extend your hand and they come in for the hug, or vice-versa. This can happen in several instances....

1. you meet your girlfriends/boyfriends' parents for the first time....shake or hug? It's best to wait for the cue from the parent

2. co-worker/boss - out for drinks with your co-worker, then time to go home...shake or hug?

3. the old lady working at the lingerie section in Nordstroms just spent an hour helping your find the best bra (she helped you in the fitting room)....hug or shake, or just a thank you?

4. you see an old co-worker on the street...hug or shake?

5.  you just finished a job interview...hug or shake? (see the Friends episode where Rachel goes for an interview)

6. come up with your own

Squeeze-a-shake - they give you a little squeeze at the end of the shake...a little extra "I luv ya"

"Did you have to let in linger" shake (aka the Cranberry Shake) - they are still shaking your hand long after the shake should have ended

Amnesia Shake - you met the person 20 times and they still say nice to meet you and shake your hand, not remembering that they've met you

No Shake 4 U! - There's those non-shakers in the world, the ones that refuse to shake any hands, are impolite and ignorant, or obsessive/compulsive and afraid of germs. It's best to move on from these people.

Shake a paw-paw - when you shake your cat or dog's paw

Baby Shake - when you hold out your finger and a baby grabs a hold of it

The Right Hand Busy Shake - they are holding a baby, or a bag of groceries, or a stack of notebooks, or their right hand was just dipped in egg batter, but they are still kind enough to shake your hand, so they extent their left hand to you

Well, it was awesome hanging out with you (I'm now shaking your hand....well, actually...I'm going in for the hug!)

LD's Bed and Breakfast: The Argyle Inn

Coronita

This is good when it's hot. With a lime wedge. Every so often I buy a six pack of the Coronita at the corner store and the guy always says "are you sure you want to the Coronitas? They are little". Yes.... I know, I just want a little.

this is midwest

The Chicago street fest. I gained 10 lbs. looking at this sign.

summer

Very often my summer supper's look like this. Grilled meat (in this case chicken sausage...Trader Joe's has the best variety of flavors! and sweet potato, grilled onions, paired with a salad with fun things in in...a fruit, or dried fruit, a nut, some cheese.

From the vault: Paris 2005

I took a trip with my friend Jenny to Paris 5 years ago. Sort of a 35th birthday present to myself.  One of my most favorite trips. We stayed in the Latin Quarter. It's nice to stay in one city for a week and explore the neighborhoods. Everything is delightful there.

5, 6, 7, 8!

I thought I would branch into other topics since I've made a space or myself here...why not? Can't my life be ldelicious yet not always involve food? Yes, of course it can.

I've been teaching some afterschool guitar classes in Chicago Public Schools since the Spring. It's a new age group for me...5-10yrs....well really those 1st and 2nd graders....we're getting used to each other. The first session they gave me 13 1st and 2nd graders in one class. It was mayhem. Kids came barreling in at 4pm with missing strings, untuned guitars, toy guitars, guitars too big for them,  right-handed guitars for leftys, or no guitar at all, and would toss the guitar (or themselves) on the carpet like they were flipping off their winter coat after being outside.

I gave kids time outs, sent them the principal, made kids cry...ok, that's all the bad stuff, and stuff I was not used to. I had to lower my expectations to get to the level where they could learn something and find guitar somewhat fun...it IS fun...it's just a very hard instrument to play, I would say under age 10 or so. Fingers aren't big enough. So I relaxed as the session went on and came up with musical games. They love to sing and make up songs at that age. And if you change the lyrics from week to week, they remember. They are so observant. "What's that bump on your arm?"...or "Where'd you get that sticker on your guitar?". And they tell you anything.  "I can't share a guitar with my brother cuz he doesn't like me to touch his stuff"...or "My dad lives in a different house now". They know my name now, after 3 months, they are starting to say "miss laura, miss laura!" These kids are growing on me. I felt so defeated in the beginning, thinking I would never be able to relate to this age, but now I'm learning more about how their little mind (and hearts) operate. Through all the chaos of the first session, the kids got up on a stage at the end of 10 weeks, and were little angels...we barely strummed a chord, but we sang loudly "chicken in the barnyard". (I'll actually be happy to never sing that song again...I've exhausted it with this group!)

I have a new student Annie, she's really smart and sweet and is digging the guitar after just 2 classes. "Is this where I put my finger for G?" she says..."right here?"..."am I holding it right?".....she's really getting it! Meanwhile, the other girl (who is sweet too, but often likes to proclaim things wildly (she was in my class last session and enjoys playing notes rather than chords") is saying "I'm NOT GOING TO PLAY CHORDS, ONLY NOTES!!"...repeatedly. I said to her "that's okay, you can stick with the notes for now...we need someone to play the bass note in the song"...then as she leaves class, her last words are...."well, maybe next week I'll play chords".  I'm smiling to myself.

I walk new student Annie back to the office after class. She just finished Kindergarten, but to me she seems more like a 2nd or 3rd grader, so I say to her "You did a great job today. And you know you are very mature for your age". She accepts my statement and then about 30 seconds later says "What's mature mean?"....I said "it means you are very grown up...it's good!" Then she gave me a hug and left.

Sometimes it takes a while to know that you fit in, that you belong. Patience is a good thing. I'm going to try to have more of it.

And now, a photo from Big Chicks in Uptown. A mighty big breakfast. One of my favorite breakfasts in the city. Shredded hash browns are my favorite way to eat a potato. You gotta go, it's so great. Get a bloody mary, go with friends.

Fruit on the grill

....taste like a fruit pie...so good...an orange

Mmmmmm Henry

Lunching at M.Henry. One of my favorite spots for breakfast or lunch in Andersonville. http://www.mhenry.net/

Seared tuna salad 

Quiche